Journal page (oh frustration! I can't get it in the middle or get rid of the link!)
Today a whole bunch of anger has come up. Angry at myself. Angry that I've been painting for 8yrs and feel like I'm not where I want to be. Frustrated that Ive been blogging for 5yrs and at times feel like I haven't connected in a way I'd been hoping to. Angry at myself for hiding under a rock and not being able to speak up about who I am, what I do and what I create.
Angry for not being true to myself.
I've had a few wake up moments.I was shocked yesterday when I discovered I had been blogging for 5 yrs, has it been that long?...shocked this morning when my 9yr old asked me why I was getting out of my house clothes into my 'day' clothes.
"Why are you getting changed mum, your already dressed?" 5 minutes before school drop off. "I'm going to work" was my reply.
"Where do you work?" she asked with a puzzled look on her face, fully aware that I am an artist and I do that from home.
"I work at home and I sell my art from my shop".
"Do people come here to buy your art?" was the quick question....
"I sell on line and people can my buy art from their home".
"oh." happy with that off she went.
Frustration! Why doesn't anybody know what I do?
Because I haven't truly owned it.
All of this emotion and restating who I am and what I do has made me realise how I have been hiding under a rock. How it is only me that can shout to the world about what I do.To validate myself rather than looking at others for it.
No More Hiding!
So you shall hear me talk about my new creative goodies more often and what I'm doing in the artsy world. You'll have more opportunities to buy my luscious wares. you are here because you want to know what I'm doing, I shall happily share. And I'm going to be ok with this, knowing that this is a challenge for me that at times brings up my fear and insecurities.
all is as its meant to be...huge thanks to Olive + Hope for her inspiring post on authentic, loving self promotion.